I drank as a mom - reader submitted story

beer and wine.jpg

One of the best things about starting this 100 Days of Sober page is that I’m able to connect with so many people out there just like me. People out there who are questioning their relationship with alcohol and the role it plays in their lives.

I have become friends with someone who is a reader of the blog. While she wishes to remain anonymous, she has a powerful message to share.

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I'm a Mom of two wonderful and amazing kids. They are the best thing that has ever happened to me!  

I'm a mom who once drank in front of her kids, not realizing the depths of this problem, the negative effects it had on me, and the example that I was setting.

Kids are little sponges, seeing all the good and bad. They see everything, regardless of age.

When my kids were younger, they'd play the game “restaurant,” - and on the menu was always beer and wine.  I once thought this was funny and cute and have an Instagram pic of my daughters’ “drink menu,” listing all types of beers and wines.

Ugh. When they got older, I knew they were watching, they see everything. 

A little over a year ago, we were having friends over. The kids were all playing and the adults were drinking, wine was flowing.  I don't remember ever feeling that intoxicated, but I was. When everyone left, I went to put the kids to bed, and I ended up passing out in my bed with all my clothes and makeup still on. IN FRONT OF MY KIDS. 

My son told my husband that he was worried about me and he cried himself to sleep. (my husband told me all this the next morning).  All of this makes me cringe. The next morning, I apologized to my kids. I told my husband that I was taking ANOTHER break from drinking, which was not my last break by the way.  I know that my kids will always remember that night, the night their mom was so drunk she just straight up passed out in front of them. 

Drinking starts off to be so fun and harmless, but this story right here is full of pain, shame, and utter sadness. BUT, now I no longer have to lurk in shame over past mistakes.  They can see a mom who is working on making better choices and trying to be the best possible version of herself. I'm choosing this way of life for me, but also for them.  They are and will continue to be one of the biggest reasons for me to not drink.  And that makes me feel good!